


Prisoner  (Larry Stylinson) Sequel to Trapped

by harrystylescat77



Series: Prisoner  (Larry Stylinson) [2]
Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Depression, Eating Disorders, Future Fic, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Self Harm, Sequel, Suicide, Trapped, basically just an ass ton of depressing shit with probably a lil smut at the end ;), self injury
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-02-03
Updated: 2014-04-04
Packaged: 2018-01-11 00:43:04
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 5
Words: 5,307
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1166566
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/harrystylescat77/pseuds/harrystylescat77
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>*Sequel to Trapped*</p><p>It has to get worse before it can get better. Can Harry and Louis find and mend each other's broken hearts?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> this be the sequel to Trapped. It's also on my Wattpad account along with other works by me, under the same name!!  
> thank you for reading!

Louis' done it. He's pushed him over the edge. Or maybe Harry's done that to himself.

Either way, Harry's breath is getting more and more ragged and his fingers keep shaking around that damned gun pressed to his skull.

Maybe one of my fingers will slip and land on the trigger, he thinks.


	2. Prologue

He found him in a rather cliche manner.

Harry worked at a cafe in the mornings. It made him calm, the smell of the fresh bread filling his nose with every breath, warm and welcoming. That was, until someone would open the door of the small shop and cold air would rush in and remind him that he couldn't always be happy.

But with the cold air came good things, Harry thought, like   
costumers. His boyfriend would step through the back door for lunch every other Dayaks gave him a kiss and sometime flowers from the florist down the street. Harry tried not to think of their relationship too much, it tended to give him headaches, and heartaches.

Alex wasn't Louis. But maybe that wasn't even the problem, Harry didn't know. He tried not to think of what Alex was thinking when Harry would drift off randomly and Alex would ask him what was wrong and Harry would just say nothing. He didn't want to know what Alex was thinking when Harry would wake up in the middle of the night, breathing out Louis' name only to snake his arm around Alex's waist and fall back asleep minutes later. His boyfriend never said anything about the dreams, or anything for that matter and Harry was beyond thankful.

He wasn't using Alex, of course he appreciated his presence and support, but he was kind of just there. Alex was nice, caring, and even knew every spot of Harry's body that made him go wild, but.

Sometimes Harry thought back to the last time he saw Louis. The back of his head, walking straight out of his room, his life. How Harry felt so empty inside that it hurt and he couldn't breathe. It was just that Alex never made him hurt that bad, so he stayed with him. It made sense in his mind.

Alex was good for him, and Harry knew that. He would always be there to snatch the bottle of pills out of his grasp or when Harry felt like he was one step away from ending it all. He loved Alex, but whether it was like a friend or a boyfriend, he wasn't sure.

Alex made his mind numb but Louis made his heart race and Harry didn't know which one he loved the feeling of more.   
~~~~~~~~

Harry sat on top of the counter in the back of the cafe. That's where Alex would meet him in about four minutes.

This was his favourite part of the day; when he got to close up shop for an hour, make himself and Alex some soup and sandwiches and just breathe for a minute. Hekicked his feet out and back, hitting the wall of the counter with the backs of his heels.

Alex was never late. Harry heard the bell on the front door jingle, signaling a costumer. He went to get up, to tell them with a tight-lipped smile and a sympethietic look that the cafe was closed for a while when he froze in his tracks, all the air seeming to get sucked out of him and the air around him get suffocatingly hot.

"I know you're closed right now, but- Harry?" The lad gaped, voice cracking on his name. Harry felt like he wanted to cry. Or barf. Or, better yet, cry and barf. This was a bad thing, this was a terrible way for this to happen. This wasn't what he wanted.

He moved one hundred miles away and had eight years to himself, a break from everything, only to see the person he thought he'd never see again standing in front of him of all places.

Now, he was mad. He remembered why he didn't chase after the man. Hell, he wanted to chase and run after him more than anything in the world but he'd held himself back. He jumped off of the counter top and strode over to him, eyes brimming with unshed, hot tears, and stopped before him. He'd grown about an inch, but Harry'd grown more. His eyes angrily whisped over his face, seeing the way the man's stubble was ragged, messy, aand his hair was very long.

"You fucking think you can just walk into my shop whenever you feel like it? After eight damn years, Louis?" Harry yelled, voice crumbling in his restricting throat. He was shaking, buzzing with thoughts and emotions swarming his mind. They were all so different, so many to choose from he just couldn't pick.

"I-I didn't-" Louis stuttered, eyes wide and careful, more a dull gray than blue than Harry had remembered. He couldn't help but think he'd gotten a hundred times more beautiful, though, something he never imagined was even possible.

"Louis, I just, fuck," Harry couldn't get anymore words out, any words that made any sense, at least, before he couldn't hold himself back any longer. He missed the way Louis' warm hands would hold and stroke the sides of his face when they kissed, just like now, lips forceful and teeth scraping.

"I hate you," Harry murmured into his mouth, of course he didn't mean it, well, he did, but, "so, so, fucking much," he couldn't stop kissing him, though, was the problem. "Missed you so much, too," he kissed down Louis' jaw and on his neck, all hot huffs of breath, noting how he smelled exactly the same and Harry couldn't wait so he bit, and sucked and teethed at the older man's neck, pushing him up against the shelf behind him, hands working at his sides and up and down his back. He pulled back, admiring the small red mark right under Louis' left ear.

"Haz," Louis had his head thrown back and his eyes tightly shut and his chest was heaving heavily when Harry heard a familiar creak. The back door.

"Harry, babe? Bought you your- hey, who's this? What's going on?" Alex appeared around the corner just in time for Harry to jump back from Louis, heart racing at the thought of getting caught.

He tried to casually wipe his shiny mouth on the back of his hand, making it seem like he was scratching his nose. He watched out of the corner of his eye as Louis did the same, the pulling his sleeve over his hand and covering the dark red spot on his neck.

"Uh, this is, this is Louis, an old friend, and we were just talking," hHarry felt his face heat up and he could almost taste Louis' wince when he mentioned the word 'friend'. Alex nodded at him, side eyeing him and keeping his lips in a thin line.

Alex eyed him carefully, he was only about two inches taller than the older one, the hair was exactly the same colour, whiling Harry tried not to think about too often, but Alex's was shorter. He had a more muscular build than Louis, who was all soft angles and curvy spots. 

Harry fiddled with his hands, not sure how to go about introducing them. Did he introduce them?

"Louis, this is Alex," he told Louis, reaching for the flowers in Alex's hands and sliding their fingers together, "my boyfriend," Alex brought Harry's hand up to his mouth and kissed each knuckle and Harry could already tell that he didn't like Louis. He watched as Alex looked Louis up and down and saw the older man shrink back into himself. He tended not to like most of the people that tried to flirt with Harry. 

Alex turned Harry's face with his hand and pressed his lips onto him, Harry was caught off guard, but Alex's touches and the way he would swipe his tongue across Harry's bottom lip to gain access to Harry's math made him weak.

Somehow, he heard Louis' gasp over their sliding wet lips and his heart started to sink. But Alex was showing his territory and there was no stopping him now as he licked hotly at the inside of Harry's mouth. Harry let him, his hands grazing the sides of his body then moving up to his neck.

Then came the jingles of the front door, telling Harry that Louis had left, yet again.


	3. Chapter Two

Harry never trusted a lot of people but when he did, he fell hard. Some days Harry felt like he couldn't pull himself out of bed so he would just pull the covers over his head like a shield, protecting him from all things hurtful in the world.

He refused to talk to Alex and if he did he would end up lashing out and shouting at him, screaming things like why would you ever love me? You're a liar, who would want a whore like me?

Once he was calmed down, though, enough for Alex to get close and cuddle him, stroke his hair, Harry would wonder aloud if Alex thought he was pretty, or if Harry was too ugly for him.

At first Alex thought it was ridiculous, Harry was a grown man and he was crying into his hands every other night. But then he started to understand, Harry wasn't so normal, and hints that were easy for regular people to do are very hard for Harry to do. The simplest tasks such as brushing his teeth, washing some dishes, or even just walking around the house were like trying to jump over a hundred foot brick wall and on top of all that his feet were glued to the ground.

It was that sometimes Harry simply didn't know what to do anymore, it was just that same numb, empty feeling in his chest he got when he really wanted to leave everything.

His therapist called them panic attacks, or anxiety attacks, when Harry would throw glasses or anything he could find against the wall and it would shatter to the floor. She told him it was because he bottled up every single fear and emotion inside his body and locked it up tight until it just exploded. Sometimes he worried that the voices he heard in his head were right and he really was just a coward and a slut and he was making everything up for attention and he would never ever get away from his problems.

He tried not to think about it too much.

Sometimes Harry would tell Alex, when his lips were ghosting over Harry's milky white skin, and the only sound in the room was their bodies sliding together, he would tell him how he wanted to try again and maybe this time he wouldn't be a coward and back out. Alex said it broke his heart, to see Harry so broken and not want to live at all anymore. 

He kissed his lips to hush him, kissed his neck then made love to him. 

In the morning Alex took every lat bottle of medication out of their home and in a garbage bag by the side of the road. Since Harry had told him what he was feeling, Alex couldn't stop honking of coming home to Harry laying on the floor in a pile of his own blood. The thought itself turned his stomach over and made his head go dizzy.

Alex took off work a lot, staying home and cooking Harry his favourite foods and setting the TV to his favourite shows all day long. He did whatever he could in his power to keep Harry's mind on something other than nothing. 

On a particularly bad night, Alex switched on the radio and turned the volume up, moving his hips and arms in a weird made up dance. Be bounced around the kitchen until he heard Harry laughing loudly from across the room, sitting in his spot at the kitchen table. 

He shuffled over to Harry, grabbing his hand and pulling it up to plant a kiss on his knuckles before pulling him up and back into the kitchen area where the music was the loudest.

And this was exactly what Harry adored about Alex. No matter what the mood, if Alex saw Harry was upset, he'd do anything to make him smile.

But it turned in an instant, a slower song coming on over the speakers and Harry rested his head on Alex's shoulder. Harry whispered how he's never felt so hopeless. He told him it was like being in an empty room by himself and his greatest fear walks in. And he's doing all he can to fight the fear off but all the while he's standing on a plank on the ground that's see sawing back and forth, making him wobble and fall over.

By the end of the song the top of Alex's shirt was soaked. He hugged him tighter, wishing he knew why a moment could go from being so happy and carefree and dancing to this; hopeless and feeling like there is no other way out. 

Harry ran into the bathroom and locked the door. Running after him, Alex was too late, left banging on the door and telling him it was okay and he would help him.

But instead he heard a small splatter of water then a toilet flush. When Harry opened the door, his lips were red and swilled and his nose was puffy and he croaked in a the smallest voice, "I threw up".

Alex's face softened, eyes closing as he rested his head on Harry's shoulder and tightened his grip around his waste.

"It made me feel better, Lex, I liked it," Harry said, voice hushed and weak from earlier.

"Don't say that, please, don't you know how much this hurts me?" 

"But this isn't about you, Alex, it's about me and if it makes me feel better then I think I should do it!"

Harry stormed off to their room and Alex went to the couch. His nights were becoming too long and he was beginning to think that Harry's therapy sessions were a waste of money. 

Alex woke up on the couch to the sound of Harry's smooth voice. But it was hushed and he wasn't talking to him, so Alex got up and shuffled per to their room, stopping before the closed door and listening. 

"...think we should try again, I miss you...could make it work," Alex only heard short snippets of Harry's low, rumbly voice, his eyebrows creased and he strained to hear more of the younger man's voice. 

"We could meet up...to my place, please, Lou I need you," that was it, Alex wasn't having any of this. He thought the run in from Harry's old "friend" Louis would be the first and last time he'd ever hear of him but apparently not. And when Harry was depressed and anxious, there was really no telling of what he would do.

Alex opened the door, breaking the barrier between them and just catching Harry whipping the phone from his ear and hanging up, trying to hide it under the covers.

Alex raised his eyebrows. "I know you were talking on the phone, Harry, who was it?" He asked, deciding he would give Harry a chance to explain himself before he would confront him.

He heard Harry swallow from the other side of the room. "Uhm, just a friend, you know," Harry stuttered. Alex knew he was lying, he'd seen it when he ran into them the first time at Harry's cafe. Alex saw the spark in Harry's eyes and how Louis' cheeks had been a little more flushed than he thought to be normal. And he didn't like it.

"Are you lying? I think you are, that was Louis wasn't it? Who is he anyway?" Alex was getting mad by then, he'd balled his fists up and Harry had sat up more on their bed, but haunched his back and almost coward below Alex's wide frame. 

"I'm sorry, I promise he's just a friend from a while ago and we just want to meet up and chat, okay?" Harry's voice wobbled, scared he would upset his boyfriend so much he'd break up with him. And Harry didn't think he could handle another break up. 

Alex side-eyed him, searching the worn and tired face of the man he's loved for almost ten years. He thought that there had never been more tension in their relationship until now, until Louis came back into the picture, apparently.

"Fine. But Iove you, Harry, and I don't want anyone to take you away from me," Alex softened. He wandered over to Harry, watching him force a reassuring smile. 

"We're just friends, Lex, absolutely nothing more. It's just I haven't seen him since I was twenty, I guess," Harry shook his head, watching his boyfriend melt before his eyes. Harry always got his way, he knew Alex inside out and he knew exactly how to bend and cold him to get just what he wanted and nothing less.

"Okay, I trust you," Alex leaned forward and kissed the younger man's cheek before getting up to leave the room, "and I love you".

"Love you too, Lex," Harry murmured. 

Harry sat back on the queen sized bed and looked down at his hands. He couldn't stand the fact that Alex trusted him with his life and all Harry wanted to do was kiss Louis.


	4. Chapter Three

"It's perfect," Louis mumbled. He stroked the red, stretched skin, admiring the black ink through the floor length mirror. Warrior it said. Because that's what Louis was, a warrior, a survivor who had come so far and waited so long to finally be free.

"Glad you like it."

"I love it, thank you, you're amazing," Louis beamed at the artist who was slumped in his chair, gathering his tools up. The fiery haired man just laughed and shook his head.

"And, hey, about that boy you were telling me about," he said, quickly changing the atmosphere in the small office, "it'll work out, mate, I promise. things like that don't stay that way forever".

Louis gave him a small smile and made sure to add and extra tip before he left the shop. It'll work out. That's what everyone said.  
~~~~

"I wanted to give you these, you know, before you leave," Harry grabbed Louis' wrist to stop him from turning around.

Louis' eyes widened at the sight of the large bundle of flowers, roses to be exact. His lips moved like he was trying to speak but nothing came out.

"Like I've been saying for the past hour, I am really, truly, honestly sorry. I said it ten years ago and I'll say it again. You have every right to never talk to me again," Harry said, voice hushed and low. Even though Travis wasn't home at the moment, Harry wanted to be as safe and secretive as possible. 

"Where'd you get these, you must've spent a fortune-there's a ton of them," Louis' admired the bouquet, he couldn't help but get excited at the sight of two dozen light pink roses, he could t help when his cheeks turned a few shades darker.

Harry hesitated, "I work right across from a florist it really wasn't a problem. I want you to take them, even if they aren't nearly as beautiful as you are, I hope they count for something".

Harry shoved his hands in his pockets, not knowing what else to do or where to look or how to breathe. The smaller man, stubble prominently ghosting over his cheeks and down his chin into his neck, took them into his own hands, carefully making sure their hands didn't touch, Harry thought. 

"Thank you Harry, they're wonderful, I-" he shook his head and Harry silently congratulated himself on successfully making Louis utterly speechless.

Louis turned around then and Harry's smile vanished. He'd almost forgot that Louis didn't live with him. Most of the time he felt like he did when they were together, like children playing a game, but the game of life.

But he squinted his eyes as he spotted something black glistening lightly against the back of Louis' neck. 

"Wait, what's this, Lou?" The nickname slipped out and Harry wasn't sure if it was appropriate or not to use anymore. 

Louis' hand skimmed over the marking as he turned around. "Oh, just something I got done, it doesn't mean anything, really," he brushed it aside. He knew Harry was burning his eyes into Louis' head, he didn't believe him. 

"No, Louis it has to mean something, you don't just get a random tattoo for the fun of it," Harry pressed, not sure how far he should venture. It really wasn't his business but he was dying to know.

"Alright, I mean, it says warrior and I got it because I think that's what I am. Though all my life that's what I've become and fuck it, I'm not even halfway done with my life yet. Do you ever think about that, Harry. I'm only twenty seven and I've done so much so far. I have no idea what I'll become next or what I'll do or accomplish. And you don't either, you could do anything you want, Harry. There's not need to stay tied down, weighed down by everything. Life's not a burden, don't treat it like one," Louis finished talking with his hands on Harry's shoulders, and he may have been shaking him.

The taller man's eyes were wide and innocent, having absorbed everything Louis'd just said. 

"I guess that's why I got it, I hadn't planned on telling you but," Louis shrugged, eyes darting around the hallway.

Before he knew it, Harry's hand moved to press to his cheek, and his breath mingled with Louis'. the space between them was tight, almost pulling them together like magnets, trapping them in their own small box together and locking it shut.

Harry pulled away from him, gasping for air, and ran his tongue over his top lip, that was Louis he tasted. Louis was all through his mouth and down his throat, in his veins and engraved in his heart. 

"I can't- I can't resist you, Louis," he growled, kissing the corners of Louis' mouth, sneaking his tongue out to catch the stubble of hair on his upper lip. "Everywhere I turn, every time I try to get away from you, to move on, there you are in right front of me," he breathed, half into Louis' open mouth. 

Louis nodded, shutting his eyes tight and letting Harry's breath create a layer of moisture over his whole face. He missed it, Harry's breath, Harry's kisses and touches, Harry. The more he thought about it, Harry was everywhere he turned as well. 

"You are amazing and I can't hold myself back anymore. I want this so bad, Lou," Harry smoothed his fingers up and down Louis' face, feeling like he could just trip and fall right into his eyes and never get out.

Louis hadn't stopped nodding since Harry's lips left his face. "I want it, too," he whispered almost inaudibly. 

Harry grinned into his neck and squeezed him. Because even after all this time, Harry knew Louis was still the one he loved, no matter what.

"What the fuck? I fucking knew it!" Harry's heart sunk to his feet and he gasped, pulling away from Louis and eyeing Alex. Alex was fuming and Harry wasn't sure what to do to try and recover the situation because it wasn't like it wasn't what it looked like. It was exactly what it looked like; the reuniting and realisation between two lost lovers

"It-it's not- Lex, please, I-"

"Don't even try. I know exactly what this is, I'm not an idiot," he growled. harry thought he'd never seen him so mad and it was frightening, making his back run with tingles. "I knew it,you're just a little slut who wants to have everyone to themselves," Alex was spitting in his face and Harry cowered against the wall. Was this what it used to be like for Louis every single day? Harry never wanted to know.

"Hey, stop. You can't talk to him like that, you don't know what he's been through," a shy voice came from Louis. He couldn't just stand back and watch, it was his fault, his mess, he needed to clean it up. 

"I know more than you ever will. Nobody tells me what to do in my house. I want both of you whores out of here in five minutes or else I'll call the police," Alex snapped. Harry had known it'd eventually happen, he just didn't know when. Louis had maybe just pushed him over the edge.

Harry reached for one of Louis' hands and balled the fist of his other, burning his eyes into Alex. Everything he ever thought he knew about him was gone. He no longer was the sweet heart who Harry knew would always ease him, he would ever be that again.

"C'mon, Lou, we can just leave," he tugged Louis towards their door, each grabbing their coats on the way out.

The last thing he heard out of Alex's mouth made the bile in his stomach turn over and threaten to rush up his throat. 

"You're a bigger scumbag than your father ever was!" Then the all too familiar sound of a slammed door.


	5. Chapter Four

Harry knew Louis like the back of his hand, the front side of his pillow, the tea he made in the morning.

He knew Louis like Louis would never know, with lips mapping out every inch of delicate skin at two in the morning with the only sound in the room being the soft snores echoing in the smaller man's throat.

Harry could kiss him for days, and he did, and Louis never once complained because he knew what if felt like to be alone and hopeless and he never wanted Harry to go back to that place again.

Harry could also eat Louis out for hours. It had to be his favourite thing to do, other than of course holding Louis in the folds of his arms and tucking him into his chest when they slept.

That he adored, unwrapping Louis, watching his vulnerability uncover beneath him with fists clenched into silk sheets and tears soaking their shared pillow. He'd writhe and plead in pleasure, then grab the back of Harry's head, pulling at the coiled  
strands to bury his mouth into him even deeper.

Louis' body was smooth and hot like melted butter and Harry would murmur into his ear what he wanted to do, torturing Louis with nothing but his words and his tongue for hours.

He'd yank Harry away when he thought he couldn't take another second of it and dragged him up his slick body to search through his mouth, sifting through all the mumbled words and kisses and humming into the taste of himself.

He knew he would never find what exactly he was even searching for when he kissed Harry.

Harry had always known Louis like his own.

Louis climbed down from the larger man's lap, feeling joyfully young but, at the same time, too mature and old to be playing with his food on his boyfrind's lap. He was feeding Harry small bites of his dinner. Since harry had told him he thought he was getting fat and gross and wanted to go on a diet, Louis had gone parent-mode and was watching him constantly like a hawk.

He found the only way to keep harry from running away from the food and locking himself into the bathroom was to literally sit on him, so he did. But he'd decided that Harry'd had enough food and hopped off, brushing his wavy hair out of his emerald eyes, he held onto the sides of Harry's face and kissed his forehead lightly.

"Please promise me you'll try?" He asked, uncertainty floating heavily in his eyes. Louis thought he could fill up and entire ocean with everything he worried about and nearly none of the worries were about himself.

Harry's face started to crumble and his head fell so his chin rested on his chest, breaths getting heavier and thicker, catching in his throat in little coughs. Louis brought the man close, folding him into his chest and tried make him as small as possible.

"I can't," he whispered, voice weak and breaking. Louis could feel his heart start to cave in on itself because that was what Harry always said.

Maybe the next day would be better. Harry seemed to have good days and bad days but most of the days were bad.

On weekdays, Harry woke up early and (sometimes) made himself breakfast and got ready to go to the flower shop and open up. He also sometimes left notes if he was feeling extra poetic, for Louis to find two hours later wandering out of their room and into the kitchen, mindlessly and sleepily starting a kettle of water on the stove.

He rubbed the thick sleep out of his eyes and padded around the small kitchen and over to the fridge. But he didn't open the white door. Instead he reached out and peeled off the small piece of paper taped to the top right corner of it, a colored in heart scribbled over the folded side.

Louis smiled shyly to himself, peeling the tape slowly off the lined paper note, sticking it to the counter top he was standing by.

Ten years later and I'm still in love with you

I guess we're just meant to be together

Harry had drawn silly faces and hearts all over the note that made something inside Louis curl and twist until a smile broke onto his face. Harry did things to him he thought no one else could ever do.

Louis didn't like to think about the fact that Harry was ever so slowly fading away, he had been always. He loathed how thin Harry had gotten, how he seemed to just float around instead of walk and when he'd sit on the counter top of the tiny apartment they could barely afford his legs looked like nothing more than a pair of chopsticks with two gangly feet at then ends.

He liked to think more about the flowers Harry brought home from the store even though he really shouldn't because somebody could've bought them and they really needed that money.

But Harry still brought him flowers. He always said how money couldn't buy how much he loved Louis.

But Louis could never think very happy for long because he'd be interrupted by a certain air in the room and he would just know something wasn't right so when he'd run and check on Harry all he would see was a small, scared little boy with blood on his sleeves and vomit on his chin, asking, no begging, him to tell him how could he feel this alone when there were eight billion people in the whole world.

Eight billion different stories, eight billion dreams and ambitions and Harry felt totally and utterly alone. Louis'd never had to devote so suddenly to loving someone this much until now, when he came to this great brick wall, this beautiful man that needed all the love in the world and then some that sometimes Louis didn't think he would ever be able to give him enough.

How it broke Louis' heart when Harry would ask him if he loved him, and Harry would find his answer in the dark, hazy corners of Louis' hesitation.


End file.
